Self Doubt

I don’t know about anyone else out there but I am extremely competitive. I grew up playing team sports like soccer and basketball which allowed me to channel this competitiveness is a positive manner, to make the team as a whole better!

Yet, years later I am just as competitive as I have always been but I have found that its has turned into a constant battle of self doubt. My competitiveness lies with myself and my need to not fail. I find myself challenging myself to do better, however I find myself getting into my own mind which leads to a negative attitude about things at times. I went into hill night thinking like this, saying to myself there is no way that I will be able to do this (side note hill night was actually a grand time – never ever thought I’d say that).

I have been trying for years to get back into running like I used to however every time I try, it starts off okay but I eventually I find myself failing.  The last time I attempted to start running alone, it began swimmingly but I began to doubt myself and I got hurt and stopped running all together, effectively failing myself.

But with the help of Team Myles this time it is going to be different, my competitiveness is going to turn back to helping our whole team (including myself) get better, and get away from my negative thoughts and self doubt. I read a quote by Ryan Holiday the other day that said “think progress not perfection” and it really has resonated with me. I need to get away from the idea that I will be able to run 10km over night perfectly because it is never going to happen, and in order for me to do so I must progress through the process. If I can go out for run and do a little better than last time, that is progress. And guess what we are all doing better and progressed more than where we started from, so we are all doing just great!

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