Honestly, trying to find a balance between work, another commitment and Team Myles isn’t happening for me. The more effort I put in one area of my life takes away from the other parts that need me too and it just feels like I’m failing in all areas.My phone has 17 unread messages, I’m always tired. Always. I haven’t been the best friend to my people. I haven’t called my mom much, if at all. Don’t get me wrong, I am loving being active, being apart of Team Myles and making wonderful connections but a part of me feels guilty and sad that I’m making new friends but don’t seem to have time for anyone I loved prior to this. As I type this I see my self pity. I SEE IT.
Man, how lucky am I? What a spoiled brat I’ve been. Oh, poor me, getting all of these cool experiences like private class from Mike Munro of Therapeutic Approach, all access to TAYS and GoodLife. Need new shoes? The Running Room has got your back (well it’s feet but back worked better there). Their experts watch me walk and ya, even though they all said I had a wide foot, I’m not mad. They got me the perfect pair of shoes and that’s all I wanted. One of my coaches Leanne is a Physiotherapist with Lifemark. Oh, I have a problem with my knee? Leanne takes care of it. I don’t think I can run from Citadel Hill to the parking lot of Point Pleasant Park. Leanne won’t accept that, she pushed me to finish it and I did finish it. My mentor Catriona, knows I missed a hills night. She gets me out to the hill for a private session and like a tiny sadist, pushed me to what I didn’t think was possible. Another coach of mine Cindy, has come so far in her journey with running. She is a true inspiration to me and someone I would call a role model. I just love the women on this team. We are who we are and I just love getting to know them more, week by week.
So yeah, I’m tired, I have 17 unread messages and I don’t have time for much else in life right now and my friends and family get it. They do. They had to see and deal with me at my worst and now I’m getting healthier by the day, working towards my goal of completing the Bluenose 10k. I feel them supporting me and my journey and they know I love them.
I am just so grateful to be apart of this team and for all the wonderful humans in my life that simply believe in me.
I feel it.